Posts

Showing posts from 2016

Cat In The Manger

I read an article this morning about a cat napping in a manger at a church in England. The clickbait that caught my attention read something like, "cat kicks baby Jesus out of manger for a nap, world goes wild..." As I read along, I was pretty entertained, as this cat is apparently the resident church cat. She gets into various types of church mischief. She once jumped into a coffin, which banned her from funerals. But, the further I read the more I realized the click bait I had fallen for-the world wasn't going wild at all. At least not in the sense that I interpreted it to be. On the contrary, like myself, the church people were pretty entertained by the cat's latest stunt of kicking baby Jesus out of the manger to nap. And though that's a silly thing, one that makes animal lovers all over the world giggle, it made me think. Today, who is in my manger? Who is in your manger? What, church people, are we entertaining ourselves with? Like the cat, how often do w

Coffee Chaos

This morning was a bit chaotic, as mornings can sometimes be when you have to get yourself and two small ones out the door by 6:35 a.m. My alarm went off at 5, and apparently I turned it off instead of hitting snooze because I didn't wake up again until 6. That meant I sported yesterday's pony tail today. I carried one boy to the couch and fully dressed him in rushed desperation while he was still sound asleep, and quite literally drug the other one out of bed by his feet. He's basically too heavy for me to lift, but I can definitely pull his little tush to the ground. Wake up, sleepyhead. They were essentially lifeless the entire getting ready process this morning. We were ten minutes behind when I realized I couldn't find my keys. Fifteen behind when we got to the car and I remembered the two crates of bottled waters in Walker's seat. I sat my coffee down on the console and climbed out of my seat a little huffy. Took care of the crates of water, settled back into

Hey...I Love You.

Image
As I was leaving a place the other day, I hugged the neck of a sweet friend, as is our custom way of saying goodbye. I started walking off, and she called out, "Hey-" I turned to look, there was a pause and then she said "I love you..." "I love you too, I replied" with a smile and continued my trek out the door. Exchanging "I love you " isn't uncommon for us, so it felt normal in the moment. As the day went on though, I pondered the nature of the interaction and something about it felt unfamiliar. So, I shot my friend a quick text and asked if there was something else she wanted to say in the moment but hadn't. She replied that there wasn't, but that she just felt like she needed to tell me she loved me. A bit later in the conversation she shared that her thought process in the moment was, "I just think she should be reminded that she is loved and seen." It was sweet, and I appreciated it, but honestly, I pondere

Run the Race

A few months ago, my oldest son asked me if I would run a 5k with him. He'd been preparing daily for months and could run that distance at good speed and solid stamina with no problem at all. I, on the other hand, hadn't really run much distance at all since my first 5k two years prior. I could still remember how unbelievably satisfying it was to train for something and pass the test of endurance when it was show time though. It was nothing short of exhilarating. So, when he asked me to do it with him, I eagerly obliged. This was just the push I needed to get back into running. I began to train again and my love for the "sport" was reignited. Running was truly a passion, one I had let die out by not actively engaging myself in it. It took weeks to build my stamina and endurance back up to the point where I was ready to run the race. There were many days of frustration where my body physically could not withstand what it had just days earlier. There were days of victo

Just For The Taste Of It...

After a few determined months of going without, I picked up a Diet Coke again this month. It started as just one because I "needed" it, and with that sip I was reminded of how much I enjoy that calorie-less slight burn of the bubble on my tongue that is Diet Coke. It felt good. It tasted good. I've no doubt it's an addiction-one I've laid down twice now and picked back up. This time it had only been a few short months. I've gone as long as nine months without the "just for the taste of it" satisfaction once before picking one back up in a moment of weakness. Here's the thing-as much as I enjoy the taste and immediate results of the drink, I don't at all enjoy the lasting effects. I've been without, and I know overall I feel so much better mentally and physically when I'm not drinking that mess. It holds me back, makes me tired. Keeps me from being the best physical and mental version of myself. When I shook the habit, I felt like I

Set Aside

This morning by 10:30 am, my boys had already disagreed (quite loudly and with tears) several times about one electronic device or another. I'd had my coffee and my time with Jesus, the things that normally set the peaceful tone for my day. But, I decided that I just didn't want to hear anymore arguing at the moment. At least for a bit. ;). I turned off all electronics in the house and outlawed those that weren't currently being used as well. No television, Netflix, iPod, Kindle Fire or X Box allowed for one hour. It took approximately 25 minutes of complaining, declarations of "it's not fair", "Can I take a nap instead?", "Can I sit at the table and eat so I don't have to play with HIM?, finger sucking, MORE arguing about what to play, and whimpering before one of them, I don't even remember which one, had an idea they could agree on. There had been a plane crash. They'd create a "crash landing site" in which they could s

Rise

My children have a special bond with their baby cousin, who happens to be autistic. In particular, my oldest seems to have a unique connection with him that touches the deepest places of the heart of each member of our family. There's no limit to the ways these two adore one another. The love, kindness and gentleness shown between them undeniably paves the avenue for Cale to express himself freely and unleash his loving personality in its truest form. It allows Walker to thrive as a caretaker and encourager, spurring him to love deeply and compassionately intercede where words and processing capabilities challenge the littlest one. They bring out the best in one another, these two. Walker sharpens Cale, and Cale sharpens Walker. Their secret? Love. They simply love one another. Unconditionally and without hesitation, these two have broken the barriers of vulnerability, they've disregarded the differences between them. Sometimes it seems as if they live in two separate worlds.

Trust Fall

At youth group a while back, my husband wanted me to do a trust fall with him to model a portion of his lesson to our teenagers. It must have been a last minute illustration for him, because I was unaware of what he had in mind when he asked me to come stand with him. When he said he wanted me to do a trust fall, I was excited. I probably haven't done one of those since high school, and I remembered them being fun. I turned around and prepared to fall backwards into the strong and safe arms of my protector, who I knew would never let me fall. I have, without question, complete faith in him. Yet, as I tilted my body and began to let gravity take effect, my right foot stepped backward, to break my fall. I glanced behind me to make sure he hadn't moved. Suddenly, I was aware that deep within me, lies a smidgen of fear. Fear of falling, fear of not being caught, fear of the one person on Earth that I know will never let me down, letting me down. "Trust me," he said with a

Inside the Waves

If you've been to see Finding Dory, you've probably seen the mini movie of the seagull who is terrified to leave it's nest in search of food. It's mother goes out before him, along with all the other gulls and leads by example, yet the poor baby gull struggles to find his confidence in the experience of watching others. With some luring and driven by hunger, he is finally convinced to leave the safety of his nest and venture onto the water's edge. With a glorious tiny clam just inches away, as a delicious reward awaiting him, he hesitates and suddenly, he's slammed by a wave. Drenched and afraid, he hobbles back to the safety of his nest. I'm quite certain he was determined to stay there, warm and secure forever. However, there's no food there, his mother is at water's edge and he's also alone. The safety of his nest is suddenly less satisfying, and he musters enough courage to try again. Again he faces large crashing waves, and inches away from
I've been working this week to select the recipients for my end of the year awards at school. Some are selected by meeting a certain criteria, and some are selected at my discretion. It's hard, this task of choosing who deserves which honor. In my eyes, they're all deserving of an honor in one sense or another. I try each year, to disperse as evenly as possible. It's not that I'm a proponent of everyone gets a cookie. Sometimes, not everyone deserves the cookie. Everyone does deserve to have their value recognized though, whether or not they happen to be high achievers or the best behaved. Sometimes, you are amazing and still fail to fit into one of the defined categories of recognition available. It's hard. But school rewards are a thing. A good thing. A thing to be celebrated. Just not the most important thing. Not the only thing. As I rationalize to myself who truly worked hard for and earned each award, sometimes loathing the task before me, my mind wander

When The Battle Isn't Yours

I witnessed recently, a small child wrongly accused by another child's parent of breaking in line at a public event. I'd seen the entire situation play out and knew the child was innocent. I watched them try to defend their self only to have the adult cut them off with a harsh, "oh yes, you did..." I spoke up once and quickly let it go, deciding it wasn't worth the confrontation that was about to play out. I winked at the child, gave a quick side hug and said "it's ok. Let it go." I could tell it was hard for the child to just take it, to be wrongly accused of such an offense. It's a big deal to cut in line at that age. A bigger deal to be accused of doing such a thing when you actually didn't. It's difficult when we have to take the heat for things we didn't actually do, isn't it? Maybe you've been there. Perhaps you've been the victim of an ugly rumor, maybe your spoken words were received in a way other than how you

I Brought The Ugly

Today was an ugly day. And by that, I mean today was an unbelievably beautiful day and I brought a lot of ugly into it. There were interruptions to my "happy" all day long, and instead of seizing the opportunity to find the good and look for God, I let my feathers get a little ruffled. Okay, a lot ruffled. I found much wrong with many things, people, circumstances...whatever today. I griped a lot. Everyone and everything was at fault. Everyone and everything except me, of course. Only I knew better. It was me. I brought the ugly. The late afternoon and evening hours saw a peppy spike in my poorly clad mood, and all ended on a prettier note. I only wish I hadn't let unplanned circumstances and minor interruptions to my agenda rob me of so much joy. I knew better. It was me. I brought the ugly. I'm wrapping up this evening, basking in the redemption of undeserved grace, the comfort of unmerited favor. Thankful that even when I bring the ugly, God is still beautifully g

Come As You Are

Earlier this week,  I aired all my dirty laundry for all to see.  Actually,the laundry was clean, and technically I didn’t air it.  I folded and put it on hangers.  Then, I took a picture and posted it on Instagram.  My caption alluded to how far behind I was and said something along the lines of “this is real life” with a few hashtags saying #justbereal and #laundryfordays. Shortly after posting, something profound happened.  I began to get text messages and private messages thanking me for posting something that helped someone else feel normal, like they weren’t alone. One even said they’d felt so defeated that they couldn’t stay on top, when it seemed everyone else had it all together.  There were  6 or so brave posters, who openly admitted on my post that they too were in the same situation.  Some even confided with all my Insta followers, where their pile o’ laundry resides. Privately sent words like “it made me feel so good to know that I’m not the only one who struggles to st

Where are the birds?

Friday morning, I took a solitary stroll around my neighborhood. Normally I'm already at work just as the sky is turning light, by this particular day I was home. And I was all alone. As I walked, lost in my own thoughts, during this rare quiet moment I began to notice all the sounds around me. Sounds I don't normally get to soak in. A light mist was falling, cars shuffling down the road through the school zone just outside our neighborhood, the sound of their tires slowing on the wet road as they approached the line of cars waiting to turn into the elementary school. Ignitions cranking in the surrounding driveways (reminding me how much earlier I have to be at work than all of civilization), the pitter patter of my dog's feet on the pavement below me. The neighbor dogs barking their jealousy of his apparent freedom from their locked fences. I took in the sights, felt the cool rain fall on my face and looked up. That's when I noticed for the first time, the beautiful ba

How Comfortable is Comfortable?

We were on our way home from Mansfield tonight, which is where our Wednesday night church gathering is held temporarily. As we approached our church land, Will said, "Mommy are we going to go by and see the church?" I reminded him that we had gone by to see the "church" (aka GA red dirt, some newly laid pipes and some wooden frames that I'm sure there's a name for, but I don't know it, as well as some flagged off areas waiting in preparation for slab to be poured) already. "Remember we saw the bobcat thingy digging just before church? And also we went yesterday. And Monday. We've seen the church a lot this week." He replied, "Yes, but it's Wednesday night. It's what we do. We go see the church." He's right, it's Wednesday night and it's what we do. Every single Wednesday night on the way home we go by there and shine the headlights all across the land to "see what we can see," even though we've

Growing Pains

One night recently, after he'd been asleep several hours, my baby boy became very restless in his slumber.  After determining he had no fever, but watching him continue to moan, thrash and shudder in his sleep I grew concerned and asked his daddy to come observe for a few moments.  We noticed he was reaching for his legs and squeezing them, while still caught in an uncomfortable state of not being awake, but certainly not fully asleep either. This is when I learned that earlier in the evening, he'd complained of his legs hurting. I'd been out of the house that evening, and daddy had done bedtime without me. Growing pains, we assumed, as this has been a sporadic occurance throughout this little one's life.  Eventually, after some more flailing and when whimpers turned to real cries and tears, he awakened. He was so delirious from his sleep being interrupted so abuptly, that he couldn't effectively answer our questions about what was bothering him. He supplied several

Don't Pluck The Nose Hairs!

Image
Have you ever looked at someone else and wondered why you can't be as (fill in the blank) as they are? Why can't I be as thoughtful as her?  How come she seems to be able to balance motherhood, a healthy lifestyle, caring for the downtrodden, and serving others cheerfully and with such grace and I can hardly get my own people out the door dressed and in one piece, five to ten minutes late to wherever we're headed?  Much less think to pick up a card or deliver dinner to someone having a rough stint. Why can't I this? Why don't I that? It's been said... ...and can I get an AMEN? It's so easy this day in age to compare ourselves to others with all the publicity we give our daily ins and outs on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and the like.  As good as social media can be, it can also be one of the Enemy's greatest tools in bringing down the spirit of God's people.  On the contrary, we don't necessarily need social media to inform us of all our self per