Splash the Puddles

I caught a glimpse of His glory recently.  I was on the treadmill, nothing particular on my mind-just enjoying the feeling of doing something healthy for myself, when I had a flashback. A flashback of a year or two ago, to a time when I really didn't like myself very much and there was a good bit of "ugly" in my heart. A time where my actions, words, thoughts, feelings and emotions were driven mostly be insecurity. A time when I sought human approval and acceptance above the unconditional and freely given love, grace and acceptance of my Savior.  Scripture tells us, that "a good man brings out good things from the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings out evil things from the evil stored in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of." Around a year ago, I began to do a bit of inventory in my own life, a heart check, we can call it. I knew there were some evil things lurking in my heart-some unforgiveness that was crippling me, some r...

We were driving down the road the other day on our way to CFA for our school's spirit night, and we were chatting about our day. Things got quiet at a red light, and then Walker said, "Mommy, some of my friends won't listen to me when I tell them about Jesus."   He sounded so sad.  I asked him what he meant and he said, "They won't listen to me about Jesus. They think when you die alls that happens is you turn into a skeleton." I would love to be a fly on the playground (where I assume these conversations take place) when he talks to his friends about Jesus.  I can't help but wonder what he says. I know he understands the need for salvation, and it thrills my soul that he love his friends so much that he tells them about Jesus too.  I talked to him, the best I could with him being five, about how the Bible is clear that the Christian life will be difficult. That he has chosen to live his life in a way that at times won't be "popular" am...

The list was long.  Wash all the laundry. Take a load to Goodwill. Clean out my closet. Put some tubs of baby clothes in the attic. Repair the rotting cabinets under the sink. Finish filling out paper work from identity theft. Switch cable companies to one with channels more suitable for the boys. (And  NFL Sunday ticket).  Write out a plan for implementing five small healthy/snack meals for next week so I can begin to unpack all I've packed on. Make the menu for next week and grocery shop.  The list was long. The list is still long.  Those were the ideas I tossed around in my head of what could be accomplished this weekend, but none of them were. And I am so glad.  Instead, an afternoon nap and a fun Friday night with some of our best friends and all the kiddos, which included the perfect laughter of a one year old beauty and a two year old charmer, who chased one another round and round. Laughter I wanted to bottle up and release an ounce at a time the ne...

It's been on my mind today, this paragraph I wrote in my blog post last night... " Taking the Lord's name in vain is not something that comes natural to me. It's just not something I practice.  Some may read this and think I'm being ridiculous-"it's just an expression, a saying" they may argue. I disagree." It's not often I publish before being fully confident I have said what I intended to say, and last night wasn't an exception necessarily...this is just a follow up. My thoughts were moving faster than my fingers (which I am convinced are affected by carpal tunnel) and I didn't finish my point.  When I say it isn't a struggle, I don't mean I never use the term. I also don't mean I never have typed OMG in a text. I surely have. Just today, in my classroom, I caught myself utter "Lord..." under my breath in frustration at someone not listening to me. When I say it's not a struggle, I mean it doesn't consu...

Recently my five year old son overheard an adult he doesn't know say "Oh my God" multiple times in a row in reaction to something going on.  This bothered him. A lot. With confusion and brokenheartedness all over his face, he walked over to me in a soft voice and said "Mommy, that lady keeps saying Oh my God." He had tears in his eyes.  I should mention that we have talked to Walker about why we don't use the Lord's name in vain, and what that means. But the conversations haven't been lengthy, and it hasn't been an issue in our home or family. He hasn't been in trouble or chided by anyone about such usage.  I can't shake the image of his expression when he came to me. A small child, a new member of the family of God. Someone who has just recently recognized his need for a Savior and responded to God's calling to accept Him as his Savior and Lord. Heartbroken over three words uttered from the mouth of a stranger. Words that affected hi...

Kindergarten. It hit me like a ton of bricks tonight. My baby, my precious firstborn, the little person who first made me a mommy, is going to kindergarten.  I'm trying to figure out how this happened. Weren't the nurses and midwife just screaming orders for an emergency c-section STAT and kicking all our friends and family out of our hospital room?  Wasn't it just moments ago, I was pleading with God, begging Him not to take my child when his heart rate wouldn't come up? Wasn't I just laying on that operating table, so out if it, I couldn't remember what we named him, gazing at his adorable face and trying to make sense of all that had just happened?  Weren't we just holding him a few days old in the wee hours of the night, as we stood in amazement that he was ours?  Didn't I just watch him roll over, crawl, and take his first steps? Didn't we just move him from his crib to a big boy bed? Didn't we just send him off to two year preschool?  And t...

We all want (and need) that one person who can sympathize with us and whatever we may be going through. I know I find so much comfort in knowing that I am not the only one who's been "there."   When I'm struggling in my parenting, I find so much resolve in conversing with other moms of boys. When I've had a difficult day with my students, I lean on one of my teacher friends. When my weary emotional self feels insecure, I turn to special friends who know me inside and out and also struggle with their own insecurities to remind me where my security lies. And that I'm not alone in my struggle. When Walker is covered head to toe in hives and I've had it up to "here" with unidentified triggers, it's helpful to talk to someone else who's dealt with the frustration.  When a lizard jumps off the table  directly at you while you are peacefully sunbathing at the beach, causing you to hop up and run faster than you ever have before, all the while sc...